INCOGNITO - sorry!!!

So I haven't been on in a while. Needed to stay away from it just a little. I think I had reached a climax and dropped to the floor...lol....I got tired of seeing purple. I got tired of comments. I didn't want to look at bracelets, keychains, donation forms or any of that...I just realized that organizing this event consumed my life for the past 3 months. It sounds dumb but sometimes I wonder what convinces me to do these things. Its tiresome. Stressful.

Last weekend I went to a sale with my friend Nadia. We were waiting in line. It seemed like forever because it was so hot outside. While waiting in line, Nadia was on the phone and I looked across from me...It was Jenessa...well a little girl who looked exactly like her. I mean exactly. It really freaked me out. She was playing a "patty-cake" type game with her sister, singing her little song and I couldn't help but smile. She turned around and saw me staring. She winked at me and blushed. I wanted to cry. Then all my stress, my effort, my fighting became justified by the glance of one little girl.

I am at a good place right now. My hair is growing back. I am becoming more active. I have been running around in preparations for my move to Boston, which is totally the fire in my belly nowadays. I am behind with paperwork. I don't have a VISA, I don't have an apartment, I don't have anything besides an acceptance letter, and I just realized that that is ok. The past year has taught me one thing, shit will happen whether you want it to or not, but everything will always work out for the better.

I have a great life. I have exceptionally great friends. Everyone is already reserving weekend stays, which I think is amazing and as well as a great comfort to my parents. People still don't believe me when I say I had cancer. I think sometimes I don't believe it myself. Some relatives are still in denial that the past year happened. It hit me last week,though, when my family and I were driving home from Boston. I didn't stop, not even for one minute. I completed everything I said I would. When people said stop, I said go. I am completely and utterly sick in the head. Why? If I stop that means time ran out. The clock stopped ticking.

I need to cry and it hasn't come out yet. I need everything to be peaceful for just 30 minutes. Maybe I should go get a massage. Something about a total stranger touching you with hot rocks...lol...ah wells...a massage it is!!!

500 people, $20,000.00 later.....

My event was this past weekend. Surviving on 2hrs of sleep, swollen feet, 5 vodka 7's and absolutely no food consumption, I made it!...lol...I have come to the realization that no matter how much good one person might do, it will never be good enough.

The hall filled up. The line-up was intense. I greeted all my guests at the door. Each table with purple napkins and balloons. It truly looked like a gala event. I spoke, the director spoke and then Momma Polito delivered her speech, leaving everyone in tears. My acts all co-ordinated, one better than the other. Over 100 prizes to raffle. A sweet table in abundance, and yet some people complained there was not enough food. You really have to love Italians and their mentality. It is unfortunate that our eyes are bigger than our stomachs. People held through till 9:30pm...they stayed 9hrs!!! I was overwhelmed with the positive responses and how many guests thought it to be a fantastical event. I tried my best.

My committee came together in many ways. My mother and Rosanna slicing up a storm, preparing platters for the evening. If it wasn't for them, let me tell you, alot of stuff would not have been ready. Friends and family working together, preparing the tables. My sister cut her hand slicing bread. It can go on and on. Everyone helped out.

My amazing co-workers who all showed up with purple flowers in their hair. Here I am thinking they were tryng to stand out as the fantastical individuals that they are and yet they were representing me as the teenage girl they met many years ago as a trainee at the hospital. They delievered a speech which brought me to tears and presented me with a letter of recognition from our Prime Minister, Stephen Harper. Umm...that freaked me out. Not many people can make me cry so they accomplished a huge lot. Santina Mormina's perserverance will never stop amazing me. She should have been born under Taurus instead of the sensitive Pisces that she is. I will say it all the time...The telephonists at SC are the prettiest girls around, and with the best attitudes...don't catch them on a bad day, but they are absolutely wonderful. Between them and their families...I am truly blessed.

500 people attended. $20,000.00 was raised. WIGGED OUT IN PURPLE is the 2nd group in the whole province of Quebec to raise money for the Lymphoma Foundation and we set a record for raising the most money. That is an accomplishment in itself. I am just happy that people enjoyed themselves and that I can safely say that 90% of guests are looking forward to annual events. My objective was to raise awareness of this cancer for it is becoming more common.

I really want to thank everyone for their support. I feel that I can never truly say that enough because Tavola Grande really demonstrated how much I am loved by many and how many people would stand behind me because of the trust they have in me and my efforts. That means the world to me because that was the reason behind all of this. To have people trust that what I am doing is for a greater good and that they would not think twice about another event to come.

I am taking the week off from this event because let me tell you seating 500 people is a task in itself....lol. Next week we start on the 2nd event, which will be more of a party and held in August. Thank you all again. My efforts are not great without your support, but because of your acknowledgement I stand on cloud 9.

Thank you!!!

Tavola Grande - My Speech!!!

For those who were not able to attend the event,
here is my speech which I delievered:

I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for coming today. This event is very dear to me for we are raising funds for the Lymphoma Foundation Canada. My name is Elisabetta Polito and I am the fundraising director of the WIGGED OUT IN PURPLE Committee.

Last August, at the age of 27, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I continued living my life, when I was told I should stop. Stopping was not an option and I felt that I needed to do something in order to give back. This is when WIGGED OUT IN PURPLE became a committee. It is about NO Wigs. Just purple. Helping to fight Lymphoma Cancer.

I had a cough, which had persisted for 2 months and I went into work one day. I was hospitalized at the end of my shift. Everything had happened so quickly and my life literally changed in the matter of a day. I did not know what to do, nor did I know how to feel. I had to tell my parents that the doctors think I have cancer. When confronted in a situation such as this, moments in time, memories from the past flash, in front of you and you stop and wonder, “How will I be remembered? On that day my family glued itself together and became the foundation on which I stand. They became my strength, and my heart. My family and friends became my supporters. They became a shoulder to cry on, and the arms that held me tight when I felt I was in despair.

Between countless treatments, hardships, and continuous strain, I had to become strong in order to fight this disease. You stop to realize that life holds a deeper meaning and that you need to deal with the cards that have been dealt to you. A friend of mine asked me the other day what my philosophy was. I am my own worst enemy as I am my own best friend. I will not be defeated by own weakness but will push against with my own strengths. It just was not time to bury Lisa Polito.

Today is a celebration between my family, my friends, and my many supporters, to say that I have won the fight against cancer and that I am living proof that things do get better. Tavola Grande is just the stepping-stone. I am a daughter, a grandchild, a sister, a niece, a cousin and a friend. I am not a celebrity, I am the girl next door who was diagnosed with cancer and now I am the face you will associate with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. It is with this fundraising event and with your support that we can give back to the Lymphoma Foundation Canada and help fund research for this cancer. People are still not aware of the seriousness of this disease but today 500 more people have become more informed.

I would like to embrace this moment by sitting around la tavola grande, and sharing this meal with you all. I would like to thank Angele Menard for her continuous encouragement, my fundraising committee for countless hours of planning and organization, and my family for their undying love and to all of you for attending today.

Today I stand before you cancer-free. I await a clean bill of health and all I can say is that no matter who you are, no matter what life has planned for you, become your own motivation and stand strong in knowing that when you look in the mirror at the end of the day, you can smile and say that I did it!

Counting it down!

Tavola Grande is just around the corner. My basement looks like it was hit by a purple tornado leaving behind the trails of wrapping paper, raffle tickets, prizes and a bunch of other stuff. It is moments like this where I highly doubt my parents will miss the chaos I bring in our home. Boston - 2 1/2 months to go...lol

200 ballons, 500 flyers, 600 event prgrams, 700 awareness ribbons...if anyone has anything to say I think I might just lose it. Jeeze Louise. Already comments are flying and honestly speaking I am doing the best I can. Working on this fundraiser made me feel like I was getting back to myself. Back to running around, being busy and not really having time to do much else because work needs to get done. It feels good. I miss my old self alot. So far we are 500 people. Not too shabby for a first-time event. Ironically I have absolutely no enthusiasm for it and I guess it is just my defense mechanism gong into drive so I won't be set up for any disappointments. Realistic Lisa sets in.

Anyone who is suppose to be there is coming. That is more than enough for me. Obviously my objective was to raise funds but above all it is to celebrate the hardships of the past, the stability of the present and the commencement of an upcoming and wonderful new life. Tavola Grande is an accumulation of my friends and family who have supported me in the past year. This is what the event is about. Even if I gave the foundation 20 bucks, it really is a day about being surrounded by goodness. Sometimes we lose perspective on that and play the bitter card. I am grateful because I think that if I did not have this goodness around me, maybe I would have opted for bitterness. I wouldn't have allowed it, though, and obviously neither did any of my family and friends.

I truly believe life is about taking what has been thrown at you, absorbing it by all angles and see the good that can come out of it. As much as cancer is a horrible sickness, it brought me closer to my friends and truly brought out the love of my family. With that said, nonna bought a purple sweater. That is when you know you are truly loved. She would look like an eggplant just for me!!! So being that my birthday was yesterday, I would like to cheers with all of you and thank you for just being yourselves - fantastical additions to my life!

Remission starts, 28, & The Little Mermaid!

Writing every other day has become somewhat difficult with the event approaching, but here we go. Happy Birthday to me!!! I am 28. Cancer-free and ready to party. I don't have to wake up early anymore for doctor appointments, but here I am at my computer at 6:16 am..lol...First day after my last radiation and I can'teven sleep in. Jeeze louise.

Yesterday was an emotional day. Last day of radiation. For the last time, they were going to put that mask on my face and beneath the tight plastic pressing against me, I shed my tears. Before leaving my house, I had tried calling MIX 96 to request a song. It really feels like it's pulling teeth. I also tried on my last chemo treatment. Anywho, this time I finally got through and requested "What a feeling". I don't think he believed me. MIX96 is starting to suck arse!!! I never call in for these cheesy games and stuff and the first time I really wanted something...bah....it's like that, right?

As they removed the mask from my face, I asked them if I could keep it. They knew I wanted it. I took it and I am going to get in mounted. If Duchamp could have done it with a urinal, why can't I?...lol I freaked my sister out when I put in on and ran around the house with it. lol...Seriously my life is great! I had left the Radio-oncology, say good-bye to the other regulars, and for some reason the day of my diagnosis came into my mind.

I was wearing a yellow top, blue jeans, always fantastically accessorized and I fell into daddy's arms and screamed for the first time. Yesterday, I was literally was in my pj's, and when daddy came home I fell into his arms for he sent me a dozen white roses. I feel like I don't look the same. I feel now that I have changed, a little. I look at pictures of myself from last year and feel I don't recognize that person anymore. boh!

As much as I am saddened by my situation, I am happy and blessed by everyone's support and I could not have done it without my family and friends. Maybe I should put that in my speech for Sunday...lol...Dang! I have to write a speech.

Tonight, all my family is coming over. My Little Mermaid cake has been ordered and every year that is all I request. Many question how mature I really am, but Ariel is all I got. On my 28th birthday I start a new page, the new side of my life, my remission. All the treatments are over. I don't need to go to the hospital everyday. I don't need meds, masks or anything.

This summer is my summer and let me tell you, the next 3 months look fantastically interesting.

Just found out....Wednesday May 21st

I went in on Friday for my treatment to find out that in reality I only have 2 treatments left. I was told that I was going to have 21 sessions but instead I am having 18. My smile rose from ear to ear. I was so happy and excited for the first time in a very long time that the other patients looked at me like I was a freak. I didn't care. Deep down inside they were happy for me, I know it! So this means I finish everything on Wednesday, May 21st. By my birthday, the event, I will be offically over with treatments, officially cancer-free. Free from all this procedure and medecine. Free from pain and on to a new beginning with my life.

I am looking forward to start new. To try and make things better. To view the world through different, perhaps more objective eyes. It feels like you have reached the peak of a mountain. The struggle of getting up there. The pain and sweat. Once you reach it, all you want to do it slide down and feel the adrenaline rush of a fresh, exhilirating experience. Cancer was my mountain. Fighting it became my rush. I didn't stop even though I will shortly pay the price for it...lol...its all good. I did my best.

Music is everything for me. My drug of preference if you will. Whether it is listening to "Enter Sandman", Metallica, for a good rock song, Bette Midler, "In my life" for a good cry but one song became my mojo music which I would play over and over. I remember listening to it in the car the first time the Concordia Design Program rejected me, and it became the fire under my arse to pursue everything I ever wanted. Listen to "What a feeling" Irene Cara. Some of you will get it, some of you will think it is cheesy. I think it's great.

2 more and I am done..."What a feeling".....

6 more to go

If my calculations were right, I would have been finishing radiation next Friday. Just in time for the event and just shy of my 28th birthday. Do you think I remembered that Monday is Victoria Day...so everything is pushed over to the following week. Jeeze louise...just my luck! It's okay, right? What is another day? #*&^@&#+!!!!!! lol

The event is coming along. I am nervous. Getting to this point, though, has really been an interesting experience. You get to see the true characters of individuals. Claudia, Sabrina and I set up an info booth on Wednesday. Clearly the parents of these children were not interested in buying WIGGED OUT merchandise, but thats ok. Be cautious the next time you buy a box of chocolates when a cute little face rings at your door...lol...where is this money going? I am a sucker, I would probably still buy a box.

Then there are those who have really been touched by Lymphoma. I met one women yesterday whose husband died from it 4 years ago and he was 42. She donated money with no question. Then someone else who was actually a Lymphoma survivor could not care less of the fundraising efforts for the cause. Life is strange sometimes. Bitterness can really take control on someone's frame a mind and its a real shame.

I spoke to a doctor and he has been diagnosing at least one patient a week. It is becoming so coming yet not receiving much recognition. No one knows what purple is. Who can blame them though? It hurts when you try your best to promote information and all someone has to say is how purple is a really "gay color". I become livid with how ignorant people are. Sabrina thinks I put hexes on people when I say that everyone gets their turn. lol...But it's true. It's all about taking some preventative measures and becoming educated about an unknown. The only people who know a lot about cancer are those who buried a loved one or survived from it. Really sad.

Cancer is becoming NORMAL when the disease itself is about abnormal cells that form. It's not OKAY. People tell me,"Lisa, your are lucky because out of all the cancers, it is the best one to have." Like I just made a deal at the Mercato...Are you kidding me? It's the best one to have because of my age, my health and the fact that I could fight it, but if I was 40 yrs old, my chances would have dropped big time. No Cancer is the best one to have. I still did chemo. I still lost my hair. I still went through the same process. I hope people just learn.

May 26th is the day in question. Hopefully we will be able to stick to the schedule. I am tired of waking up at 6:30..lol...as well!